Archive for the ‘Self-Awareness’ Category

FEELINGS, PASSION, WITHDRAWL, PURSUIT, COURTING

Tuesday, March 6th, 2012

Feelings, Passion, Withdrawal, Pursuit, Courting

These are words that have come up repeatedly the past few days in various conversations with friends. Everyone has a different opinion and view on how these words are defined. I have my views and opinions as well. Here is my stance on what I believe these words to be.

Feelings: How we feel about ourselves, a situation, or someone else. Feelings can be temporary, long term, stagnant, or shifting.

Passion: A strong feeling or desire for something or someone. When you are passionate about someone or something it is either hard to describe in words what you feel or so easy that you can describe it in your sleep or with your eyes closed. Passion drives you every moment and everyday to achieve or obtain said desires.

Withdrawal: Avoidance or ceasing participation in something you once frequented. Can be good or bad depending what the withdrawal is from.

Pursuit: Pursuing or striving to achieve something or someone. I don’t believe pursuing is the same as dating. Dating to me is when you are getting to know someone. Once you realize you like what you have seen so far or grown to know about something or someone, pursuit comes. This means that that thing or person is the only one you have your eyes set on. All actions are deferred to that thing or person. Getting that person or thing is the ultimate goal.

Courting: After achieving victory in the pursuit comes courting. Courting is the period where actions and discussions are made into a relationship with the intention of engagement and marriage as the ultimate goal.

As I say many times in convos with my female and male friends, pursuit and courtship are a lost art within our generation. Many of us that enjoy and participate in pursuit and courtship know that we are last of a dying breed. Hand written letters, personalized gifts, paying attention to the little things, just because flowers, or massage after a long day of work are a minuet list of things that commonly happen during the pursuit and courtship phases of relationships. Many that have done the aforementioned on the list have done it on the wrong persons where it was not appreciated. Any of my friends that fall into that category…keep the faith…someone that appreciates and respects your pursuit and courtship will come along, and will not have a problem letting you know how much they care for you. They will not withdraw or have temporary feelings for you! Be Blessed!!

We Need to Go Back to Love Less Complicated

Thursday, February 23rd, 2012

A lot has been running through my head today. Intially I planned on writing a post, but then something told me to check and see if my blog from 2005/2006 was still posted. Sure enough it was still up! This post as old as it is, describes the very emotions I’m feeling today. Enjoy!

While searching for pictures to add to my throw back collection on Facebook I ran across pictures of me and my ex from back in high school. When I was home for Thanksgiving I came across an old shoebox which held all the stuff that equaled our relationship. After going through it,  I have had many talks with my sister about back then. After contemplating whether or not to write this article or not, I decided that I would write it , to throw it out there, and see what comes back.

Memory Lane: Lets travel back to our high school years…………If anyone knew me back in the day, you knew that I use to call myself the Ugly Duckling, b/c not until I got braces was I “accepted.” I also was considered the “Good Girl.” My mom was always at the school, and everyone knew she was strict, and Angel couldn’t have boyfriends and she couldn’t talk on the phone with them…You know the list goes on. Every school has these girls. Well when I turned 16, things changed. I had a convertible car, I later got my braces off, and I started talking to boys. Long story short, I got my first official boyfriend. We were together for about 2 years. Just for the record he is married with two kids now.

Now that everyone has traveled down memory lane to high school, Lets talk about high school romances, back in our day.(nowadays kids are too grown for the own good) Normally it began as flirting in class, hallway, or at lunch. Then  comes the passing of notes and more intense flirting. Next came the friends instigating, and saying “such and stuff likes you, what you think? You like him her back” or the “Do you like me?”  After that phase has past comes the, “Will you hang out with me?, Let’s go to the mall/movies, etc” Next thing you know, you two are in a relationship and you are boyfriend/girlfriend. The two are now together and do everything together, ie, come to school together, ride home together, wait by the lockers, walk to class, carry books, hang out everyday including the weekends, go to each other games/events/functions, etc.. Quality time is spent with the other, w/o the boy/girl worrying about what their friends are saying, or who sees them….Sometimes later sex comes into play, but for the most part, many couples were not having active sex back then……The point I’m trying to say is, “What ever happened to “real” relationships? When I say real, I mean the relationships that were based on friendship and being in the company of one another. The stimulation of the mind, where body stimulation really doesn’t matter.” Could it be that when we go to college we forget about friendships, and just want body stimulation from so called relationships..

All this being said, Males when are ya’ll going to make a change? Many guys just worry about sex in a relationship. Many females give themselves to ya’ll just so that they can say they have a man, and then when they try to develop a friendship, ya’ll back out and say I aint trying to be with you like that.. Many people wonder how is it that I can be celibate for almost a year. My answer to them is that I know what I want; therefore I will wait until that time. I have decided that I will wait for that person wants me, who will put in the work to develop a friendship, stimulate me mentally, has a spiritual relationship with God, who doesn’t need sex to justify a relationship, etc. The poem going around facebook states that women should:

Find a guy who calls you Beautiful instead of Fine, who calls you back when you hang up on him, who will stay awake just to watch you sleep. Wait for the guy who kisses your forehead, who wants to show you off to the world when you are in your sweats, who holds your hand in front of his friends, Wait for the one who is constantly reminding you of how much he cares about  you and how lucky he is to have you. Wait for the one who turns to his friends and says, “…That’s Her.” Find the one who constantly compliments you,  and the one who will go out of his way just for you.”

I WANT IT ALL! Light Skin, Long Hair, Doctor, Lawyer, Six Feet Tall

Tuesday, November 1st, 2011

Doctor, Lawyer, MBA, 2-Degrees, 6feet Tall, Light Skin, Long Hair, Natural Hair, Baller, Luxury Car, 401K, Model Chick, Video Vixen, Exotic, Athlete, the list goes on and on. Between my female and male friends this list repeats itself over and over again in the “must haves, I’m searching for a mate category.” What perplexes me about this list is that our generation places status and wife/husband potential in this list as a dating rubric. I have known people to really like someone but refuse to take things further with them because they do not fall into their list of categories of what they expect their significant other/potential mate to be.

In attending homecoming and speaking with associates about dating, recent breakups, etc. This list was the common reasons for why folks broke up. It wasn’t cheating, bad sex, loosing interest, but the fact that they did not fall into what their ideal mate should “look like or be.” This was very upsetting because this was coming from highly educated individuals that have studied at the prestigious Spelman and Morehouse Colleges. 

 In a recap of the weekend with a very dear friend and sister who also observed the same comments made about potential mates/significant others, I got to thinking about my email signature. It reads, “We as a people must not let the world set the standard for what is deemed right, but God must set that standard for us. Be Yourself & Find A Way” In a nut shell, these associates are living in the world, wanting and yearning for what the world thinks/says they should have, but not what is right. If you have someone there that cares about you, is there through thick and thin, loves you for you, and may not be light skin, long hair or 6feet or make the 6figures that you want, be blessed and thankful for the things that they do provide you that money nor looks can bring. Money, Skin Color, Height, Hair Length, and Body Shape does not do anything for your health or well being. Yes, it may get you some cool points among your associates and friends but that is only temporary. We all know that what’s cool today may not be cool tomorrow.

 Romans 12:2 “Don’t be conformed to the patterns of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your minds so that you can figure out what God’s will is–What is good and pleasing in nature.”

 1 John 1:15-17 “Don’t love the world or the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in them. Everything that is in the world–the craving for whatever the body feels, the craving for whatever the eyes see, and the arrogant pride in one’s possessions—is not of the Father but is of the world. And the world and its cravings are passing away, but the person who does the will of God remains forever.

We are not to conform to the behavior and customs that are usually selfish and corrupt. We must not conform to the world’s values. Worldliness can be associated with the people we associate with, the places we go, and the activities we enjoy. It can also be internal and characterized by our attitudes and thoughts. 1) Cravings of whatever the body feels- Preoccupation with gratifying physical desires. (6feet, light skin, long hair, model chick, Video Vixen,Exotic) 2) Craving for whatever the eyes see- wanting and accumulating things, bowing to the God of materialism (Luxury Car, 401K, Baller) 3) Arrogant Pride in one’s possessions- Obsession with one’s status or importance ( Doctor, Lawyer, MBA, Athlete, Official, Celebrity)

God values self-control, a spirit of generosity, commitment to humble service, and LOVE. Women, strive to be the Virtuous Proverbs 31 Woman in your faith, service, finances, homemaking, time, and beauty. Quit looking for what a man can do for you, but change your energy to what you can provide for a man that is not materialistic or based on your looks. Men stop looking for the things of this world and look for a Virtuous woman that will help feed your soul and take care of you, not just to get accolades and praises from your buddies by having the trophy or baddest chick on your arm.

Now this brings me to another observation from homecoming…The unhappily married folks who were trying to get in and be single for the weekend. These folks use homecomings, classic weekends, All-Star, Honda and any other eventful weekend to relieve their singledom one more time to temporarily escape their unhappily married life. We all know what the divorce rates are for African Americans as well as in America. I believe that the reasons why these people are unhappy are because they married for the reasons of the world and not for the reasons the bible says we are to marry for. They wanted the trophy wife/husband, fabulous lifestyle, or the social status. Sad to say these things are only temporary and when the newness or fabulosity wears off, you have the unhappily married, which wishes they were single. Look at Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries. They barely were together 6months and the marriage lasted 72 days before they made it to splitsville. She thought she was marrying an athlete and he thought he was getting an exotic, model chick. Once again, a couple was building on things of the world and not of God.

It’s interesting that I can count on one hand the number of happily married folks I know, which is significantly lower than the number of unhappily married people I know. Out of all the happily married couples I know, one thing about them that is a constant is that they married their spouses not on worldly ideas/lust, but on the God they saw in each other. They all built their friendships/relationships on a spiritual foundation not a worldly one. When you look and see these couples interact you can see the love of God in each one of them. That is something that is missing from many relationships and marriages.

One of my favorite happily married couples is my best friend Adrienne and her husband Terek. I remember when they first met and started dating, even way back then, they put God first. This is one couple that truly lives for God and makes him ruler over their marriage and lives. Today is their third wedding anniversary. From their occupations to their hobbies and missions work everything they do, they do for the love of God. Feel free to read about them and their journey on their website. www.AdrienneandTerek.com Hopefully their story will encourage and inspire you, like it has me.

I know this post was kinda harsh and I may have stepped on a few of my close friends toes, but this was something that has been bothering me for awhile. I only want nothing but the best for my friends and associates. Hopefully this will encourage and touch at least one person to change their ways and views when it comes to dating and searching for a potential significant other.  

Maturity

Tuesday, October 25th, 2011

“We must no longer be children, tossed to and fro and blown about by every wind of doctrine, by people’s trickery, by their craftiness in deceitful scheming. But speaking the truth in love, we must grow up in every way …”  Ephesians 4.14

The things I know now, I wish I knew a few years ago. Its amazing how two even, three years can change a person. The life experiences you go through gives the best lessons. Whether good or bad the things we experience and go through in our younger years shapes the men and women we are today.  In the scripture above it tells us we cant be like children listening to everyone and falling for the trickery of the world. How many times in our younger years have we listened to so called friends, been so mind-strong in our beliefs that will close our ears/hearts to anything/anyone that does not agree? For me at 25, I know I did all of the above. I listened to friends and didnt follow my heart. I was so stuck in getting my way, and my way being the right way, I was unable to open up and hear what someone who had gone before me and had wisdom had to say.

In conversations from this past weekend I have realized that many people are still stuck in their lives from two/three years ago. They speak with the same thoughts and mind sets from before and expect that everyone they encounter are the same. Sad to say, this one chick, Angel Bernice is not the same person. Life experiences has caused  me to have different perspectives and outlook on life. Like the scripture says in my youth I fell for the deceitful scheming and trickery of the world, but in my maturity I try and speak the truth in love. No I’m not perfect, and I don’t try to be, there is no one perfect on earth,but I have matured. Maturity has humbled me in ways I never knew would exist in me. I am grateful that God never gave up on me and that through it all I have received his grace,mercy,and favor. I am truly blessed and will never be ashamed of the person I am and continue to grow to be!

Its On Its Way! You Are the Protoype!

Thursday, November 18th, 2010

Tonight I was extended the opportunity to worship with one of my phrat brothers and his wife in celebrating their church anniversary where James Fortune&Fiya, Zacardi Cortez, and Marvin Sapp were scheduled to perform and preach!

Before leaving the house I sent up a prayer to God, that I really needed to hear a word from him. I needed my strength restored and to work it out so that I could see Live and in person Mr. Encore aka James Fortune, since Encore cd has been very instrumental in helping me make it the past few weeks, and because I missed the STAND rally with CocoBrother this past weekend!

After a two hour battle with traffic I made it and boy was I in for a treat from the most High God!! Greater Travelers Rest Praise Team opened the night up on a great page! James Fortune came out and ripped it! By the time he made it to I Believe, I had tears streaming down my face! That song took over me! My faith and strength was restored! I truly Believe I Will Survive, and that God is able to fix it! James Fortune was ministering in that song tonight!!! If you havent heard that song, please take a listen! I BELIEVE

Marvin Sapp brought the word from Psalm 30: 1-5!!!!
He started out saying its okay to ask God, the Why questions? Why am I in this position? Why am I going through this? Why Now? Why Me? But we must remember God is not absent! God is the only constant! We may feel like giving up and throwing in the towel, but there is a purpose our trials and tribulations. These trials and tribulations that we are going through are only there to make us a better individual. We are gon’ be BETTER!! He said when folks ask you how you are, instead of saying okay, or going down all the trials that are plaguing us, just return the answer, BETTER! No need to discuss or say what is wrong, because those trials are only making us BETTER! As followers of Christ we know that the road will not be easy and that god says he would be with us in our trials. There is no TESTimony with out a TEST! We gotta have peace in the fire! Its safer to be in the situation we’re in with GOD, than being out the situation without Him! Let me rephrase that God says its safer to be in the situation with me, versus being out the situation without me! Our trials are there to build our character and faith! Somethings that we go through dont have anything to do with us, but someone else! Through our trials and tribulations God is setting us up to be the Protoype! Overcoming and getting our trials/tribulations will allow us to give testimony, strength, words of advice, and an example to those who watch and observe us! We are Christ’s Protoype!

In the scripture we see that through his awareness, God raised him up. I lift him up,because he has lifted me up! He spared him from going down into the pits. Our pits can be finances, self-esteem, workplace, relationships, or pity parties. We have to remember that God is with us and will protect us from our enemies. God loves us more than the stuff we’ve done. Scripture says his anger lasts only a moment, but his FAVOR lasts for a lifetime! FAVOR!!!!!!!! Can you Say FAVOR!!!! Favor is not what we have!! But Favor is Who HAS ME!!! God has me!!! FAVOR is God having me, protecting me, and shining his grace and mercies over my life!!!! You may have to live paycheck to paycheck, drive a raggedy car, live without a job,but God still has FAVOR over your life!!! Keep watching your life and you will see the FAVOR of GodWeeping MAY endure for a night, but JOY COMETH in the morning light!!! As Marvin Sapp said, “MAY, is the possibility” You may have to cry. You dont always have to cry! You have a choice what to cry on! Stop crying over foolishness! You dont have to weap, because the psalmist says its a possibility! Keep on Pressing Through because JOY COMETH in the morning! “COMETH” as Pastor Sapp says, is the ABSOLUTE! It is guaranteed! JOY IS ON ITS WAY!!! IT WILL ALL BE OVER IN THE MORNING! REJOICE!!! Your Blessings and Joy will come in the Morning! Remember to keep on pressing through! ITS ON ITS WAY!!!

Be Blessed,
Angel Bernice!